Cedars-Sinai Blog
Siblings Carrie and Arthur Have Been Taking Care of Each Other for Nearly a Century
For nearly a century, Carrie Gabriel and her brother, Arthur, have been taking care of each other.
The siblings grew up in the South, moved west in the 1940s, landed solid jobs with the city of Los Angeles and, for the past three decades, have shared a two-bedroom apartment in Mid-Wilshire.
In October, Arthur, 96, was diagnosed with terminal colon cancer. Determined not to be institutionalized, he opted against additional measures to prolong his life. He is on hospice care at home with Carrie, 95, who is his primary caregiver.
"I'm going to do what I need to do."
Caregiver is a role both Carrie and Arthur are familiar with.
Decades ago, they worked together to care for their mother when she fell ill. Several years after their mother died in 1983, Carrie faced medical problems of her own and it was Arthur who moved in to take care of his sister.
Then, 7 years ago, Arthur had open heart surgery. A few years later, he developed dementia. That's when Carrie became his primary caregiver.
Carrie is as sharp as the day she went to work for the Los Angeles Police Department 70 years ago, but admits that her days now are a lot to handle.
"I do get tired," Carrie said. Yet she plans to care for Arthur until his last day. "I'm going to do what I need to do."
Luckily, Carrie isn’t alone. She has the support of friends, neighbors, and a social worker. And then there is Dr. Sonja Rosen, a Cedars-Sinai geriatrician who has developed a close bond with the siblings.
"They are both inspiring human beings," said Dr. Rosen, who lives just five minutes away and used to visit her own grandmother in the same apartment complex where she now makes house calls to see Carrie and Arthur.
Given the option to undergo an uncertain surgery after his cancer diagnosis, Arthur decided on hospice care under the watchful eyes of Dr. Rosen and his sister.
"When he decided he wasn't going to have the surgery, he just sort of said a little prayer: 'Lord, take care of my sister,'" said Carrie. "That's what Arthur tells me a lot of times: ‘I sure hate leaving you here by yourself.'"
Arthur entered hospice in October 2016 and Carrie is well aware that their remaining time together is short.
"I have been very fortunate to have had Arthur here with me this long, and to have such a wonderful brother," Carrie said. "I'm just thankful."
"She wants him to finish his life with quality," Rosen said of Carrie. "That's what she's doing and it's remarkable. We are bringing joy into his life with love, because really all we can offer is love."
UPDATE: Arthur passed away peacefully at his home on March 23, 2017. A funeral service and memorial celebrating Arthur's life was held in April and attended by nearly 100 of his closest family, friends, and caretakers.
His sister Carrie continues to live in the home they shared for more than 30 years. She also maintains a close relationship with Dr. Rosen and the Cedars-Sinai team who helped treat, care for, and look after Arthur.
Moving forward, Carrie hopes to return to many of the activities and social groups she used to be a part of before she dropped everything to care for Arthur.
"I really do miss those things and I look forward to seeing my old friends," Carrie said. "But I wouldn't have given up not one moment I had with my brother. I think about Arthur every single day. And I miss him. I had the best brother this world has ever seen."
